Best 25+ Funny SMS / Text messages

Best 25+ Funny SMS / Text messages

Hey ! What are you doing ? Are you upset ? Do you need some fresh air ? Do you want to change your mind from upset to smile ? Then you are at the right place. Today we will introduce to the best funny messages that may change your mind. You will feel much better than before. So, let’s read the following messages…

  1. Yo momma is so fat that when she went to the beach a whale swam up and sang, “We are family, even though you’re fatter than me.”
Best Jokes
Best Jokes

2. Yo momma is so fat when she got on the scale it said, “I need your weight not your phone number.”

3. Yo momma is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and it’s still printing.

4. Yo momma is so fat when she sat on WalMart, she lowered the prices.

5. Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.

6. My dog used to chase people on a bike a lot. It got so bad, finally I had to take his bike away.

7. Yo momma’s so fat, that when she fell, no one was laughing but the ground was cracking up.

8. What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? -Snowballs.

9. Yo momma’s so fat and old when God said, “Let there be light,” he asked your mother to move out of the way.

10. Yo momma is so fat her bellybutton gets home 15 minutes before she does.

11. Yo momma is so fat that Dora can’t even explore her!

12. Police officer: “Can you identify yourself, sir?” – Driver pulls out his mirror and says: “Yes, it’s me.”

13. What do you get when you cross-breed a cow and a shark? – I don’t know, but I wouldn’t enjoy milking it.

14. Yo momma is so fat her bellybutton gets home 15 minutes before she does.

15. Some nice Chinese couple gave me a very good camera down by the Washington Monument. I didn’t really understand what they were saying, but it was very nice of them.

16. I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, “Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!” I said, “Wow!” Then her friend said, “She means 666-3629.”

17 . Dentist: “You need a crown.” – Patient: “Finally someone who understands me”

18. Innkeeper: “The room is $15 a night. It’s $5 if you make your own bed.”
Guest: “I’ll make my own bed.”
Innkeeper: “Good. I’ll get you some nails and wood.”

19. What do you get when you cross-breed a cow and a shark? – I don’t know, but I wouldn’t enjoy milking it.

20. My friend thinks he is smart. He told me an onion is the only food that makes you cry, so I threw a coconut at his face.

21. Coco Chanel once said that you should put perfume on places where you want to be kissed by a man. But hell does that burn!

22. What did God say when he made the first black man? “Damn, I burnt one.”

23. I heard women love a man in uniform. Can’t wait to start working at McDonalds.

24. My friend thinks he is smart. He told me an onion is the only food that makes you cry, so I threw a coconut at his face.

25. Oh darling, since you’ve started dieting, you’ve become such a passionate kisser… – What do you mean, passionate? I’m looking for food remains!

26. Your momma is so ugly she made One Direction go another direction.

27. Me and my wife decided that we don’t want to have children anymore. So anybody who wants one can leave us their phone number and address and we will bring you one.

28. Do not be racist; be like Mario. He’s an Italian plumber, who was made by the Japanese, speaks English, looks like a Mexican, jumps like a black man, and grabs coins like a Jew!

29. It is so cold outside I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets.

30. Yo momma’s so dumb, when y’all were driving to Disneyland, she saw a sign that said “Disneyland left,” so she went home.

We hope these messages changed your upset mood. Thank you for staying with us.

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